Who at some point in their life has not had to deal with the awesome responsibility of keeping a secret. When we are confided in by that friend what a test of character we are being confronted with. This is a juicy bit of information I could use to bolster my career by making this person look bad. I could use it to tear this person down or I could use it to build my self up. Or out of love and respect for this person I can conceal the matter. Hide it in my heart. Guard it with my lips. Revealing vs concealing. What to do, what to do? This verse may help you decide. Pro 11:13 A talebearer reveals secrets, but he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter.
Proverbs has much to say about how we deal with others especially how we deal with the information other people tell us in confidence.
Pro 20:19 He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with one who flatters with his lips.
Pro 25:9 = Debate your case with your neighbor himself, and do not disclose the secret to another;
Pro 26:20 Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; and where there is no talebearer, strife ceases.
Pro 26:21 = As charcoal is to burning coals, and wood to fire, so is a contentious man to kind
le strife. Pro 26:22 = The words of a talebearer are like tasty trifles, and they go down into the inmost body.
Pro 14:5 = A faithful witness does not lie, but a false witness will utter lies.
Tale bearers are flatterers – they say things to your face they would never say behind your back – they say them to get you to bear your soul and then they reveals your secrets – Solomon’s advice – do not associate with them 20:19
There a things we go through in our relationships as friends, family, husband & wife that should never go beyond those boundaries. They should be kept between the two parties involved. Sign of friendship – sign of a good marriage – problems are solved between the two people and no one needs to know the details. 25:9
Talebearers are people who infect offices, churches, homes with strife. They are like charcoal to a burning fire – they keep things going. The only way to eliminate the strife is to get rid of them. When they go the strife ceases. 26:20
Slander may be sport to tale-bearers, but it is death to those whom they abuse. We can commit murder with the tongue as well as with the hand. The worst evil you can do a man is to injure his character. The world for the most part believes that where there is smoke there is fire, and what everybody says must be true. 26:22
"Gossips of both genders, give up the shameful trade of tale bearing; don't be the devil's bellows any longer to blow up the fire of strife.. Praise God more, and blame neighbors less. Any goose can cackle, any fly can find out a sore place, any empty barrel can give forth sound, any briar can tear a man's flesh. Think much, but say little; be quick at work and slow at talk; and, above all, ask the great Lord to set a watch over your lips.” Spurgeon
Guard that secret a friend has told you in confidence.
Avoid those who make a sport out of spreading lies, spreading gossip, causing strife and discord. You may find that if you do this you will be out of the loop but the bible says that the loop you were in was a noose and if you are not careful it will strangle you.
Every time you make a choice, you are turning the central part of you, the part of you that chooses, into something a little different from what it was before. And, taking your life as a whole, with all your innumerable choices, all your life long you are slowly turning this central thing either into a creature that is in harmony with God, and with other creatures, and with itself, or else into one that is in a state of war and hatred with God, and with its fellow creatures and with itself. Each of us at each moment is progressing to the one state or the other. ... C. S. Lewis
Choose to conceal that which will only hurt others
Choose to be a person of character
Choose to be a person in whom people can confide
Choose to be like Jesus – Live like Jesus not only by what we say but in what we don’t say.
Let me leave you with a question – Can you keep a secret?
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